Signs That Your Dad Might Not Be Your Biological Father

article by Hector A. author
Anyone who has ever watched a daytime talk show knows it can be painful to confront longstanding suspicions about paternity. But these questions can creep up for many individuals in a variety of circumstances.

Below are three signs you can look for if you are suspicious of the family bonds that you’ve grown up with.

Physical & Personality Traits

Your physical features, and to some extent your personality traits, are a direct result of the DNA you’ve inherited from your parents. So it should come as no surprise that these are often the first clues people recognize in cases of paternal misidentification.

Of course, this is not a sure-fire test. Many people simply resemble their biological mother. In addition, it’s possible to inherit a pair of recessive genes for features that neither biological parent outwardly manifests. A classic example of this is a blue-eyed child being born to brown-eyed parents.

Nevertheless, if you find that you have absolutely no resemblance to the man you believe to be your biological father, it could be enough of a red flag to take more conclusive actions.

Inconsistent Timetables

Many people have been able to confirm their fears about questionable paternal lineage through inconsistent or impossible timelines regarding conception.

The most common example of this is inconsistencies between physical presence and the gestation period. For example, if you find out later in life that the man you believe to be your father was actually stationed on a military base or traveling nine months before you were born, it should raise some doubts.

A Lack of Love & Attention

Even if they aren’t consciously aware of any deception, it’s nonetheless very common for males to have a “sixth sense” about whether or not a child is actually theirs. No one is quite sure why this is the case. However, the idea is corroborated by the fact that the inverse is also true – parents and siblings will often feel an instant sense of deep connection when reunited after a lifetime of separation.

So, if you are perplexed as to why your father figure showered siblings with love and attention while treating you with indifference or even disdain, it’s a possible sign that he isn’t your biological father.

The Only Real Way to Know Is a DNA Paternity Test

Though the above signs might be justifiable reasons to question the family narratives you’ve  grown up with, remember that they are not definitive proof. For that, you will need to undergo a DNA paternity test and compare your genes to those of the man you believe(d) to be your father.

If you are ready to know the truth, services such as 23andMe can provide you with an accurate, affordable home DNA test kit that will get you the answers you deserve.

Your Dad Might Not Be Your Biological Father

Disclaimer

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Best Online Reviews as well as any person and/or corporate entity associated or affiliated with it merely provides links to websites of DNA test companies, and it is your decision whether to access such websites or not, and whether to contract with such companies and/or provide any DNA materials.

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27 comments
Mluleki Luthuli says:

I want to know my real father. It’s hard to stay without your father. Please help me to find, I want to make DNA test so that I will know who is my real father.

Bestonlinereviews DNA Testing Team says:

Hi Mluleki,
Can you please elaborate on your case?
We need some more information to give you the correct answer.

Abi says:

The person who I thought was my dad wouldn’t treat me the same as my sister. I was seen as his least favorite, his second choice. He always had something critical or mean to say about me, my life or my fiance. The problem is he isn’t around enough to know how my life is. He looks nothing like me. A few weeks ago I took a selfie with a man in a local band, along with my dear fiance. I showed the pic to my mother and she said he looks familiar and she found him attractive. I asked where she knew him from and she said nothing. I let it go. The next day I looked at the photo again and our faces, right next to each other we look the same. We have the same nose, eyes, chin, short and stocky build, everything. I don’t believe I can do the test. My “fake dad” won’t go through with it, and who I believe is my real father, I only met him once. I tried conversing with him via messenger but I haven’t told him and he seemed too busy for me. I have noticed my mother has been very critical offensive and disrespectful ever since I showed her that picture. Knowing i will probably never see him again, and knowing that the one who I don’t think is my real father cares about me or contacts me, it’s destroying me and I don’t know if I’ll ever have a dad. What should I do?

Bestonlinereviews DNA Testing Team says:

Hi Abi,
Thanks for your comment.
You’ve got two options, but the magic word, in this case, is consent!
You can run a test on one of each of your “fathers”. Both will shed light on your issue. But the bottom line is, you need to get consent for running this test. You can try to persuade one of your “fathers” to undergo a simple paternity test. A good “selling point” of this idea would be the fact that this test has no legal power. A good option for you would be this paternity test.

In case you don’t get consent from one of your “fathers”, you can always go the indirect path. Test yourself with one of the following tests: Ancestry.com or MyHeritage DNA. Both of these services feature a huge DNA sample databases and family tree features. Take the test and build the most accurate family tree possible. Eventually, you might find relatives that have/do not have a genetic affinity to one of your “fathers”. Please note, that you might also find no insights at all.

Good luck,
And if you succeed, share your results with us.

Bless selorm homeh says:

Very worried man at the moment.

I’m O+ and my wife B+ and our son is AB+.

Please can you help me with the the result

Bestonlinereviews DNA Testing Review Team says:

Hi mate,
It is a quite awkward situation.
First, anything we will tell won’t replace an advice of a physician.
Evidently, the situation you describe is statistically not feasible.
But don’t worry, things could be figured out quite easily.
You can do a discrete paternity test to shed some light on this.
Get yourself this paternity testing kit.
Follow the instructions specified on the product and you will get a straightforward result.

Good luck and update us if it is helpful.

Jessica says:

Okay so my “father” whos been told he is my father never treated me as his daughter never showed or told me he loved always talked down on me and could never do anything to please him im 40 yrs old now and im tired if this feeling ive always had and need an answer.But he isnt willing to take test how can i find out if ge wont participate?????? Plz help

Bestonlinereviews DNA Testing Review Team says:

Hi Jess,
Sorry to hear about this sketchy situation.
We can suggest some solutions:
1) If you got siblings, you can do a DNA test together. Assuming that all of your siblings are from the same mom and dad, you can compare the results. If your’s would be different then their result, that can shed some light on your doubts.

2) You can also do it “James Bond” style. Get yourself a DNA testing kit like this one: https://amzn.to/2yiCcSv. The sample picking is done with a saliva swab. You can try to pick up his saliva DNA sample from a glass or anything else that may include your alleged dad saliva. Please note that results from this test are informational only (They are NOT legally binding & will not hold up in a court of law). Also due to legislation, the DNA analysis company won’t ship or receive DNA samples from NY state.

Hope that help and you would be able to find truth and peace.

Christina says:

If you have any siblings I believe a DNA test would reveal whether your sibling and you are related to both parents

Mary says:

I didn’t regret finding out. I just regret it took 57 years. And I’m glad my mother didn’t jerk me around when I confronted her. She immediately gave me the name and information (although the man had died a number of years earlier). What DID shock me (yes, I always had doubts) was when she added “And, you have a 1/2 brother that only lives 10 miles away!” We have since met. Yes, my “dad” was distant. Yes, my grandmother always gave me the “stink eye”. Yes, my mother would always make me feel like everything was my fault. Yes, my brother use to say “Things changed after YOU were born!”. Yes, it all makes sense now.

Anonymous says:

My father abandoned my mom when I was a kid. Messed me up for a long time. I hope this test can find those deadbeats!

Chris R. says:

It’s amazing what science can do!

David A. says:

It’s so sad that some people may not know something so important about themselves. I hope this test brings them closure.

Tommy G. says:

I’d love to do this but I’m totally freaked out that I may not like what I find. Has anyone regretted it?

Patti Farris says:

My niece recently confirmed, through DNA testing, a suspicion I have had for a long time: that the man she knew as her father is not her biological father. He was an unpleasant and odd person so she had very mixed emotions about this revelation. It was still a shock though and has caused a lot of stress and tension between her and her mother. She knows who her biological father is and is deciding how to approach him. She doesn’t necessarily regret it, but it is very unsettling.

Paul says:

Start by asking your family.

Kayla says:

My friend has a brother who found him using one of these, but he was from a great family. This article makes being adopted sound so depressing.

Alice says:

What research should I do before signing up for these DNA services?

Pete says:

These suggestions are so far-fetched. Just ask your parents if you can, or use the DNA services, sure. Constantly questioning my parents’ love would drive me crazy.

Alex says:

EVERY DAD SHOULD BE MADE TO TAKE ONE OF THESE TESTS!!!

mikejones says:

The first three points mean nothing… loads of dad’s are just crap. So many guys out there don’t know how to be a real father and just leave their kids. #truth

Alison Campbell says:

Great post. I found out my father was not my biological parent in 1977 and it was a nightmare trying to get a confirmation. It’s brilliant that it’s so easy to find the truth in the modern world.

lizzybeff says:

i’m so sure my dad isn’t really my dad. he’s never cared about me and always showers my brothers with gifts and love and barely speaks to me. I dont look like him or any of his family and when i ask my mom about it she goes all weird. i want to get him to take a test but i dont think he will. is there anyway you can test someone without them knowing it happened?

Angela says:

How accurate is the resemblance thing. I don’t actually look like my dad whatsoever and actually look like a close friend of my mom’s. However, my DNA shows up being a mix of my mom and dad.

Whitney says:

The fact that he doesn’t shower you with attention doesn’t necessarily mean he isn’t your real dad but rather that he’s an utter ass. I know a lot of stepdads that treat their kids a lot better than actual dads. That section should be thrown out IMO.

Lucy says:

I’m in a weird situation. I think there’s a chance my dad is actually my dad’s brother. What’s worse is that they are twins, so I don’t know if a DNA test will actually help figure out whose my real dad. I’m pretty sure my mom has been having an affair with my “uncle” since before I was born. I know they are having one now because I caught them together (they don’t know it though.) Is a parental DNA test good for twins?

Derek says:

If there is any doubt whether a kid is yours, get a test. I was accused of being a kid’s dad by an entire family and was being sued for child support. I knew I wasn’t and just had my lawyer demand a paternity test. Came back negative and the most messed up part is that the kids dad was the mom’s 2nd cousin! It was like living an episode of Jerry Springer. Anywho, get the paternity test.